The Lifespan of a Fly

You know, the kind where you use pens and stuff
February 4, 2011, 6:43 PM
Filed under: Generalizations | Tags: , , , , , ,

Normally I relate funny anecdotes from my life, or lists of shit that make me laugh, you know, that sorta thing. Well tonight I’d like to talk to you about something serious: the Internet.

How could we live without this vast landscape of knowledge? No longer are we restricted to information in print form only. You would think that with this wealth of information at our fingertips, our tech-intelligence would grow. Apparently, that view is wrong. If anything it seems like people are getting dumber, more secure in their online lives, and therefore more blatant about the things they put online.

I just want to make this very clear to all Internet users (and I assume you are one since you’re reading this blog post): The Internet is Not Private!

*Gasp* Yes, it is true.

Sometimes I write things I regret online, and I quickly scramble to erase whatever it is I’ve done wrong this time. But no matter how quick I am to click that little “x” box, it’s still permanent. That is until they invent a laser or something (lasers for eyes, ears, tattoos and in the near future: laser-shooting orangutans with a grudge).

So I’ve got a little advice to you. If, say, you leave an assignment to the last-minute, say, and then you email your teacher about said assignment and he calls you an apathetic loser, don’t go posting shit on Facebook about it. Especially if that teacher happens to build websites for a living, and therefore is perfectly capable of navigating an open Facebook group which is directly linked to the program he teaches.

Again, the Internet is NOT private. If you want your bitching to be private, I suggest text message, email, phone conversations, or a journal; not the online ones (public vs. private, remember), but the kind with pages and margins and stuff where you use a pen.

Of course, this is all just hypothetical. I’m just killing time while I wait for the orangutans to come and get the party started.


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